Whenever I start to feel alienated from society, I just remember the
following. You may print this out and keep it handy for reference next
time you feel humiliated, ridiculous, or different. You’re not so bad.
In fact, you’re pretty f’ing normal. Unless you are one of these people
below, in which case, I don’t know what to tell you. Seek help.
1. There are people who have an overwhelming urge to be
amputees, and feel
unnatural
and deformed with all of their limbs, so they spend their lives on a
quest to have their limbs surgically removed, and if a surgeon won’t do
it, they will run cars over their legs/arms or lay the offending limb
across train tracks to force the
issue.
There was even a hospital and
surgeon which performed the amputations until they decided to discontinue the "service".
2. There are people who claim to have a disease called
Morgellons,
in which they spontaneously get threads/fibers underneath their skin.
Some of these people think they were put there by aliens. Doctors
believe that this is a case of
Munchausen
syndrome, where the “patients” are fabricating (no pun) the threads,
possibly injecting rug fibers under their skin, to get attention. The
fibers, under a microscope, prove to be manmade, not produced by the
body. While the debate is still open on whether or not this is a real
disease and even CNN did a
report on it, my research into the “Morgs” online
community
tells me all I need to know. They need psychiatric help. One sufferer
says he sprayed his body from head to toe in Static Guard to prevent
the "electricity" under his skin, and another advises taking your radio
and television out to the desert and shooting bullets into them to kill
them. They also talk about the "other threads" in their bodies getting
upset and squirming if they pull one out.
3. Look away, those with weak stomachs: A man in Germany replied to
another man’s Internet advertisement looking for someone (yes, some
one) to
eat.
The man answering the ad volunteered to have his penis cut off, which
the two cooked and ate together. Then the volunteer allowed himself to
be killed and eaten by the cannibal, the whole thing documented on a
souvenir video. Because the whole thing was voluntary, the case is
still legally being fought out in court.
Still think your cleaning obsession, foot fetish, or love of
Yanni is weird? That's called perspective, my friend. And in the words of
Martha, it's a good thing.
